I made eight months on my current job--a year almost to the day after I was laid off. It has been almost a year to the day since my second surgery, and I have received a clean bill of health from the surgeon. It will be eight years on Valentine's Day since I proposed to Barb (we'll be married eight years on Labor Day).
Looking back, what I remember most is that it took a long time to get to today. Most of the time was spent trying to do what was in front of me, then turning the outcome over to a power greater than human power that I often just call Big Guy. Many times I had to pause when I was agitated or doubtful (codewords for anger or fear), then pray for an intuitive thought or action that allowed me to make a choice that was different from all the ones that I made before (and all too often didn't work out to my satisfaction).
Day by day, over the past year, I have managed to face Doom and Gloom (those self-centered fears of losing what I have or not getting what I want). Day by day, what I received was what I needed, not always what I wanted--those blessings that I never expected but got anyway. Barb and I have a roof over our heads, food on the table, clothes on our backs, and a few dollars left over for that rainy day. We have our health (physical, mental, and spiritual) despite the many ups and downs the past year has brought. We have the love of friends and family who have supported us through those many ups and downs.
Because of hard work and a little faith, the good times are back and the future looks bright.
I have been finding myself wanting to wallow in my problems that I don't even know are a problem yet. I believe that's called being into the future? However in my case it is a case of creating the future so I have something to be afraid of so I do not have to do what is in front of me. I mean if my fears come true, then doing what is in front of me would be useless....right??? Most everything is centered around financial insecurity and being powerless over other people. I guess I'd better start talking to what's his name, oh yeah, Mr. Big Guy!
ReplyDeleteSincerely, Mr. Imagination
Thanks for your insight. Planning the action, and not the outcome, seems to be an an art best left to those who have mastered the skills of discernment and intuition, qualities that only come from learning the lessons of actual experiences--yet all too often expectations of "how it should turn out" often get in the way of actually doing something--a syndrome often called "paralysis by analysis".
ReplyDeleteThat is why I often need to be reminded that a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.
Amen! You have a great outlook. Keep blogging.
ReplyDelete