The first time that I got laid off, there was a reorganization and I was odd man out. The second time that I got laid off, I said to the boss what others merely dream of saying. The third time I tried to be a good boy and did what the boss said, but it didn't make any difference. The fourth time I was a good boy, but the company folded anyways after a year. Yet another time, I was not only a good boy, but a loyal company man as well for six years (with what I thought was that ticket to retirement).
This time around, the layoffs started barely two months after I started working there in January. Although I have survived so far, I still follow a familiar routine waiting for the other shoe to drop (having bounced between being a contractor and a full-time employee for the past three years).
As a hired gun paid to do a job, I grew accustomed to leaving without a trace after 6 pm since I no longer fret about the "golden handcuffs" (such as health insurance, sick leave, accrued vacation, 401(k) plans, and stock options) that shackled full-time employees to the notion of job security. As a full-time employee, I have a healthy skepticism from being let go the Monday morning after finishing a critical six-month project. I am also wary of the bait-and-switch when I am approached with an opportunity to "audition" for the part on a contract-to-permanent basis.
Still, when I take the time to catch my breath after being heads down for so long, I realize that I am only really responsible for the footwork. I have always had a meaning, purpose, and plan for my life. I just have to remember that it's not up to me to know (or understand) all of the details.
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