Another Day, Another Dollar

A recruiter reached out to arrange an interview for a full-time position after I moved from the San Francisco Bay Area to the San Joaquin Valley near Sacramento.

At the time, I thought that the interview went well enough when it came to questions about my qualifications (ie, whittling down the square pegs of past positions to fit the round holes of the job description).

However, the issue of "fit" came down to the unspoken presumptions  of certain questions:

"Could you tell me something about yourself?" could be interpreted as "Are you the kind of person I already have in mind for the position?"

"What do you really want to do?" could be interpreted as "Are you after my job?"

"How would you handle this situation?" could be interpreted as "Tell me how to handle this situation because nothing I did seemed to work."

As I tried to read between the lines of those interview questions, I was reminded of a quote from my favorite author Robert Heinlein: "Sure the game is rigged, but you can't win if you don't play." In other words, I am responsible for the footwork, not the outcome.

I waited for over a week after the interview with no feedback from the recruiter. So, I sent a message that I was no longer interested in the position.

Still, I was not disappointed about the outcome, You see, I know that my life has a meaning, purpose, and plan. I just need to remember that it's not up to me to know (or understand) all of the details.

Three Rules (Coninued)

I took the opportunity to let go of my goddaughter so she can make her dreams come true. You see, I never took the time after graduating from college to settle down, get married, and raise a family. Rather, I lived vicariously as a parental figure to my goddaughter (now 29 and starting a career in Silicon Valley). Through a lifetime of family gatherings such as birthday parties and backyard barbecues, I loved her as though she was my own daughter, doting on her and spoiling her for sure, but also ready with a stern word should the occasion arise.

I first became aware that the work environment for my goddaughter is much different than the one I began my career when I read that the company where she works announced a 9% layoff. You see, I already grew accustomed to a routine of waiting for the other shoe to drop having bounced between being a contractor and a full-time employee for the past 20 years. I leave without a trace after 6 pm since I no longer fret about the “golden handcuffs” (such as health insurance, sick leave, accrued vacation, 401(k) plans, and stock options) that shackle other full-time employees to the notion of “job security”.

Still, I did not quite know how to prepare her for such a future. So I decided to share my experience, strength, and hope as words of encouragement to sustain her on her journey (as well as pass them on to others who may need the same encouragement):

"Ever since I held you in my arms the day of your baptism, you have had a special place in my heart. You are starting a career in a world that has radically changed since your parents and I graduated. First of all, there were no iPhones and Internet (which meant before e-mail, Web browsing, texting, or streaming).

We are part of the “Old School” where you always carried around a dime to make a call from a phone booth (when there were phone booths), listened to our boom boxes (which tended to be as big as we could carry), and there was no substitute for the Internet because the very idea wasn’t even around until you were in elementary school.

I have been thinking long and hard for awhile about any words of wisdom that I can share with you that would help as you start out on your professional career. I even go back a few years ago when I gave you a book on career planning (The Pathfinder by Nicholas Lore) that I hoped would prepare you for the many job searches that will occur in your work life—some you will get to choose, some that will be chosen for you.

You see, my “career” has consisted of 17 jobs since I graduated from college in 1981 (being employed anywhere from six months to six years). During that time, I have survived 7 layoffs lasting anywhere from 3 to 11 months. I have also worked as a contractor for three different companies in the past four years. Every time, I managed to put food on the table, clothes on my back, a roof over my head, and put a few dollars in the bank for a rainy day as I accept that my “career” will often consist of looking for the next job.

On the other hand, just as important as what you accomplish in your career, is the kind of person you become along the way. You see, when I got laid off for the first time in 1994 (when you were not even in kindergarten), it gave me time to do more than just put food on the table, clothes on my back, and a roof over my head — it also gave me the opportunity to spend time with you and recite my three rules (as necessary): “Please and thank you. You have to listen. You cannot always have your way.” These rules will serve as your compass because they are the values that your parents and I have raised you so that, when that day eventually comes, you can go to farther off places and we know you will be all right.

"Please and thank you” is a reminder to be respectful of others, and that “No” is a complete sentence (no reason needs to be given).

"You have to listen” is a reminder to consider others in your choices and be accountable to others for your actions.

"You cannot always have your way” is a reminder that if it is not possible for you to accept people, places, situations, or outcomes for what they are, then it is probably about “you” rather than about “them”.

So, my fondest wish is that you find your path to a fulfilling life, passionate and exciting, with the knowledge that God has given you a purpose, meaning, and plan with the full support of your Mom, Dad, and I.”

You Never Know

Still working feverishly to meet an important project deadline,  I got my seventh layoff package in 20 years. I waited for a taxi to take me home with my personal belongings, but I left the responsibilities and decisions with my manager.

Once again, it was time for me to move on.

Little did I know then that I would be out of work for almost a year. Nothing prepared me for the day I exhausted my 26 week unemployment benefit, or a hand injury that led me to collect eight more weeks of disability benefits.

I was prepared somewhat for the job search by updating my resume and applying for jobs that I believed suited me. I was not prepared for the 40 rejection notices that focused on my "lack of skills"  or "relevant experience" (but I suspected may have been influenced by my age).

Accepting what seemed inevitable, I finally admitted that I was done.

Then, a funny thing happened. I felt a load was taken off my shoulders since I no longer wanted to jump back into the rat race of the long hours (and long commutes) working in Silicon Valley, I explored the possibility of retiring early and moving to a more leisurely (and affordable) lifestyle in the San Joaquin Valley near Sacramento. After consulting with realtors and financial advisors, my wife and I made plans to sell our home in the Bay Area.

As these plans were being put in place, I got a call to interview for a job where they actually wanted someone with my background and experience that was quickly followed by an offer that I couldn't refuse.

So, I guess I can put off early retirement.

But you never know...

Passing It On

I became aware that the work environment that my goddaughter would enter would be much different than the one I began my career when she asked for help on her resume. You see, I  follow a familiar routine waiting for the other shoe to drop having bounced between being a contractor and a full-time employee for the past four years. I  have grown accustomed to leaving without a trace after 6 pm since I don't fret about the "golden handcuffs"  (such as health insurance, sick leave, accrued vacation,  401(k) plans, and stock options) that  shackle other  full-time employees to the notion of  "job security".

I did not quite know how to prepare her for such a future, so I wrote a letter from my experience, strength, and hope as words of encouragement to sustain her on her journey. I wanted to pass on an excerpt of that letter to others who may need the same encouragement:

"I have been thinking long and hard for awhile about any wisdom or experience that I can share with you that would help as you start out on your professional career. I even go back a few years ago when I gave you a book on career planning that I hoped would prepare you for the many job searches that will occur in your work life—some you will get to choose, some that will be chosen for you.

You see, my “career” has consisted of 16 jobs since I graduated from college in 1981 (being employed anywhere from six months to six years). During that time, I have survived six layoffs lasting anywhere from three to nine months. I have also worked as a contractor for three different companies in the past four years. Every time, I managed to put food on the table, clothes on my back, a roof over my head, and put a few dollars in the bank for a rainy day as I accept that my “career” will often consist of looking for the next job.

With that in mind, I have tried to craft a resume for you based on what I know has worked for me. Take the words that are contained with not only my experience and wisdom, but also temper them with your own wisdom and experience as you find your way to where you want to go.

Still, just as important as the journey from here to there, is the kind of person you become along the way. You see, when I got laid off for the first time in 1994 (when you were not even in kindergarten), it gave me time to do more than just put food on the table, clothes on my back, and a roof over my head -- It also gave me the opportunity to spend time with you and recite my three rules (as necessary): “Please and thank you. You have to listen to me. You cannot always have your way.” Those rules grew with time and experience to be the lessons of life that carried you off to college and I knew you would be all right.

These lessons of life will serve as your compass because they are the values that your parents and I have raised you so that, when that day eventually comes, you can go to farther off places and we will know you will be all right. “Please and thank you” is a reminder to be respectful of others, and that “No” is a complete sentence (no reason needs to be given). “You have to listen to me” is a reminder to consider others in your choices and be accountable to others for your actions. “You cannot always have your way” is a reminder that if it is not possible for you to accept people, places, situations, or outcomes for what they are, then it is probably about “you” rather than about “them”.

So, my fondest wish is that you find your path to a fulfilling life, passionate and exciting, with the knowledge that God has given you a purpose, meaning, and plan with the full support of your Mom, Dad, and I."

If The Shoe Fits

It was a November morning when my colleague stopped by my cubicle to quietly let me know that layoffs were happening and that two writers were already gone.  A few minutes later, our manager stopped by and asked to meet with me privately.

He simply told me that the company was going through a reorganization instituted by the new CEO who arrived the previous August, and that I was being laid off with several others who worked for my manager. After six months, just like that,  I lost a permanent full-time  job, along with the perks that I didn’t have for the two years I worked as a contractor: the  health insurance , sick leave, accrued vacation,  401(k) plan, stock options, and the 20 minute commute.

It seems so straightforward now, as if it was somehow scripted to happen the way that it did. Yet,  as I look back over three years ago when I began this journey, every step that I have taken along the way haven't  been as orderly as I would like. There have been many forks  along the way, where my choices have brought me to a place where I am today. Along with those choices has been the endless chatter of Doom and Gloom (or those self-centered fears of losing what I have or not getting what I want)  that made me constantly worry about would happen if the other shoe fell.

Well, at least for the moment,  the other shoe has fallen on solid ground and it seems to fit. I completed my first big project last Friday  at my current assignment, and I was not shown the door on Monday.  In fact, I just completed another deadline at the end of this week, with more deadlines planned for the rest of the year.

Furthermore, between one friend offering to keep a look out for possible job opportunities or another  reminding me to be kind to myself, I know  that I am not trying to live a day at a time entirely on my own. Instead, I am just a fellow traveler on this journey called  Life.

The Other Shoe Falls (Again)

With the recent arrival of a new CEO at the company, my manager told me this week that my current  assignment may not be converted to full-time status because of budgetary constraints (but he assured me that I have a job until at least the end of the year).

My immediate reaction was  to anticipate only despair and foreboding. I have a knack for subtly distorting present circumstances with past memories of disappointment, frustration, perhaps even betrayal. A common term for this malaise is "doubt".  I'm not so sure whether  the choices that I made over the past six months have been aligned with my will or God's will, or  ultimately  whether I'm  even willing to accept the outcome of those choices.

It is only with persistent and conscious effort is it possible for me to avoid slipping into a whirlpool of negativity that allows my feelings to become false evidence appearing real (otherwise known as fear). So each day this week, I start off by expressing gratitude that I have a roof over my head, clothes on my back, food on the table, and more than a few dollars saved for that rainy day.  Such a simple change in attitude leads to a faith that allows for different choices…and possibly different outcomes.

God has always had a meaning, purpose, and plan for my life. I just have to remember that it's not up to me to know (or understand) all of the details.

Catching My Breath

The first time that I got laid off, there was a reorganization and I was odd man out. The second time that I got laid off, I said to the boss what others merely dream of saying. The third time I tried to be a good boy and did what the boss said, but it didn't make any difference. The fourth time I was a good boy, but the company folded anyways after a year. Yet another time, I was not only a good boy, but a loyal company man as well for six years (with what I thought was that ticket to retirement).

This time around, the layoffs started barely two months after I started working there in January. Although I have survived so far, I still follow a familiar routine waiting for the other shoe to drop (having bounced between being a contractor and a full-time employee for the past three years).

As a hired gun paid  to do a job, I  grew accustomed to leaving without a trace after 6 pm since I no longer fret about the "golden handcuffs"  (such as health insurance, sick leave, accrued vacation,  401(k) plans, and stock options) that shackled full-time employees to the notion of job security.  As a full-time employee, I have a healthy skepticism from being let go the Monday morning after finishing a critical six-month project.  I am also wary of  the bait-and-switch when  I am approached with an opportunity to "audition" for the part on a contract-to-permanent basis.

Still, when I take the time to catch my breath after being heads down for so long, I realize that I am only really responsible for the footwork. I have always had a meaning, purpose, and plan for my life. I just have to remember that it's not up to me to know (or understand) all of the details.